Raid My Minibar: Possibly the bitchiest Jpop blog ever.

You can call me Raid
or whatever suits your fancy. I was born on 14th June 1990, of Japanese and Chinese heritage. I am bitchy, snarky and unforgiving in my comments, and there is really nothing you can do about it. I have an illusion that I am unbiased, but of course everyone else knows better. Sit back and hold on tight for the most (in)toxic(ating) ride of your life. You might want to remember who I am because someday, I'm going to be famous.

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Now Playing: Hirai Ken's Oricon Style Comment

KAT-TUN - DON'T U EVER STOP
Tuesday, May 13, 2008




I'm not dead!

For those of you that saw the hippo post yesterday? That wasn't me. Horrible Angelia.

School's been reeeeeally busy and there has be nothing but really horrendously boring PVs up on JPS, so this blog has been pretty much dead.

But finally a single I can review! With amazing and horrible songs at the same time! It's a sign from above!

7 songs this time, following my normal format.

[The good]

Surprisingly, both my favorite songs came from the same version of the single, which happens to be the most "unpopular" version of the single.

SMACK is the solo song of Nakamaru Yuichi, the group's beat-boxer. When I first heard they were going to do solo songs, the thought of both Nakamaru's and Koki's solos made me grown inside.

Surprisingly, Nakamaru's isn't half bad. In fact, it's hecka good.

With impressive vocals (considering how I've never heard him sing, and never really expected him to be able to), the song is simple, light, poppy and is really cheery. This song would have been done really well by any of the other members too, so I guess that's why they chose him to sing this one.

Nonetheless, clean bubblegum-dance-pop with his boyish voice goes well together. The transposes (yes, not only one, but three to be exact) impressed me a lot too, though to be honest, I was half -expecting him to scream and fail at some point in the song. Which he doesn't, so I was pleasantly surprised. Even the lyrics are pretty much bubblegum-poppy, with cheesy verses like "I saw a doctor, and understood I am lovesick". Perfect for listening when you need a good song to cheer you up without it being too cluttered with all the extra stuff.

Ai no Hana, the solo song done by Ueda whatshisname, starts of with very soothing and magical piano notes, before introducing various mood-ish instruments. The result is a slightly sad, yet beautiful, echoey piece of music. His vocals are undeniably the best of all of KAT-TUN, so the song can't suck too much. The music slowly builds up over time to a pretty dramatic climax before dying out gracefully. Solemn and serious, the song is coupled with pretty heavy lyrics like "Looking up the sky, I lost my heart to innumerable clouds with nothing". Woah.

Somehow, a PV with him singing in some random cave that has a waterfall with a baby grand in the background would be really perfect for this song. That said, this song is perfect if you're in for some sleepy or relaxing music. Could be slightly emo though.

[The so-so]

The titular track DON'T U EVER STOP starts off mysteriously with sort of sci-fi music before exploding into an obviously rock tune. Akanishi starts off nicely, with his "slowly" and "story" making me grin thinking about the thousands of crazy fangirls swooning over his singing.

The rest of the song was pretty blah though. The whole of KAT-TUN basically screamed through a chorus that could have been a really amazing chorus. The bridge sounded like a bunch of drunken frat boys, even ending with "Hehh hehh, hell yeah". Er, okay? The music was too noisy for you to really differentiate between the instruments much (if you're a normal listener like me that is), so the whole thing pretty much sounded like one... very melodic TV static. Not forgetting of course the very delightful and random glass-breaking throughout the whole thing. Wha...?

Suitable for drunken karaoke screaming.

Akanishi's solo LOVEJUICE was just... dirty. But still not impressive enough to be considered a good song. In fact, I considered putting under the BAD section. Upon first listen, you'd probably pick up bits of English here and there. At least I did anyways, so I went to check the lyrics.

Ho boy, it wasn't English that's for sure, it was full blown Engrish.

"I could tell you want me too Many time I think of you Delicious drink can let's produce I can taste the sweet LOVEJUICE"

I seriously don't want to listen to a song about how he likes to produce and drink sweet lovejuice. Eew. Girls around the world are probably producing their own lovejuice just by listening to the song. How disturbing.

Pop/R&B is probably how you would describe it. The annoying female background vocals detracted from the song, and the ending with the echo of "juice... juicee juicee" was just really bad. Otherwise Akanishi's vocals are decent enough to pull of this horny song. It's probably just his face... voice I mean.

Natsu no Basho, Taguchi's solo was rather.... random. It's pop with synthesized music and a piano and some sort of brass instrument. Messy. The verse is pretty decent to be honest, and the chorus is soso. However, Taguchi's vocals just wreck the whole thing. His brash and heck-care-ish vocals sound like bad singing at the year-end company dinner. It is otherwise pretty forgettable and unimpressive. There was a small part at the end where there was just his voice and a main guitar, which sounded like HY for a moment or two, but that moment ended pretty quickly.

He had a transpose too, but he just sounded like the company worker, only with more beer and gusto in his system. Nice try I suppose, but just really... wasted.

[The BAD]

Kamenashi's solo w/o notice?? is just really bad. I mean, what in the world is that title supposed to mean? Since when do the Japanese use short forms that even I don't use? What are the question marks for? All these just confuse me to no end.

Weird music box tunes lead into him sniggering pervertedly, which is followed by.... well, a lazy and haphazard tune. The chorus and the verse do not fit well together at all. The chorus is much more cheery while the verse is slightly more mysterious and lounge-jazzy. Someone probably wrote two seperate songs, mashed them together and stuffed it down Johnny Kitagawa's throat (much to his delight of course, we all know how kinky Johnny is).

And did he honestly sing "chu chu ru ru chu chu"? Goodness. Someone save me. A sniggering pervert just tried to be a Morning Musume and tried to kiss me too. AHHHH~

Gah, I almost wanted to just ignore this song totally for the review, considering what a mess it was. This song is PARASITE from Koki. Apt name really. It sucks the life out of you. Guhhh!

Screaming, overly heavy rock, pseudo-rocker-vocals, rapid macho-rapping, and probably a mix of gregorian chants and some pretty united screaming of various Engrish words.

I have no idea what he's really singing, but it sounds like "Let me check this out, I bet you want to three four five six on the mic and then the *dunnowhat garbish* you know right? (no I don't know, right) Ready? (Not really)". So impressive. He mixes puns and confusion tactics all together into one big rap-disguised-bullcrap. That takes real talent I tell ya.

I mean, you know right? Kyahahaha, I'm enjoying this far too much.

The verdict! Ready? *slaps self* Overall, the single has a nice selection of songs, it's a pity that some of them were not done nicely. Worth listening, but probably not worth buying.

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... he blogged at 6:30 PM | 4 comments! Leave a comment please!

HECK OF A LOT OF MAGAZINES.
Monday, May 5, 2008

I can't believe I declared Kenken week only to not post for 6 whole days. Heh. Truth is, school's been a bitch and together with work, blogging just seems really impossible. But now I have a wee bit of free time so here I am posting photos and photos and photos and... well, more photos.

My magazines of Kenken came this week! Needless to say, I was a happy boy.



ROCKIN'ON JAPAN April 2008

Ken looked good in this, so I was relatively happy. =D One of the pictures in the magazine was blur like oversexed bathroom mirrors though.



Kindai April & June 2008

And inside the June issue were these:




Chiaki looks ridiculous with that.... thing around her head.



WHAT's IN? April 2008

It came with one of the overused pictures of Kenken. Sigh.


The Television HOMME Vol. 2

BEST. MAGAZINE. EVER. It comes chock-full of amazingly beautiful pictures AND a 100 minutes behind-the scenes DVD! Very very happy with this one. You guys should go buy this if you're even mildly interested, it's worth the money.




non-no 3/5 Issue

With this old man's picture. He looks like someone the government wants very badly. And not for the good reasons either.


See.



CD Data April 2008

It came with the special Ken booklet which included these pictures:



*swoons*



BOAO April 2008

I don't like that expensive Prada suit he is wearing. He looks like my grandfather attending a wedding.



CanCam May 2008

This magazine was heavy as hell! And out of the 500-odd pages, there were only TWO PAGES OF KENKEN?! BAH!

And that is all! Time to rant about something off-topic.

JOHNNY'S ENTERTAINMENT IS TAKING LESSONS FROM EVIL AVEX. D:



The limited edition cover is the one on the left, and the normal edition cover is on the right.

WHY ARE BOTH MY FAVORITES IN HSJ ON THE NORMAL EDITION COVER?! HIKARU? DAIKI? WHAT ARE THE CHANCES?!

As if that wasn't bad enough, I find out the limited edition CD comes with only ONE LOUSY SONG?! WHAT?! DIE JE DIE. ALL YOU HORRIBLE JPOP COMPANIES STOP STALKING ME. RAWR.

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... he blogged at 6:19 AM | 5 comments! Leave a comment please!

Hirai Ken purchase!
Tuesday, April 29, 2008

KENKEN WEEK STARTS!



Hirai Ken - Itsuka Hanareru Hi ga Kite Mo

Nothing much to complain about this single. Cheap! 630 yen! And yes, that's the picture inside for those who are curious. He looks so... eyes-closed-is-my-sexy-look-eh ish. Meh.



Hirai Ken - KEN HIRAI Films Vol.9

Have not watched it yet, so I have no comments on it as yet. It came with a lyrics booklet though, which was sort of surprising. =/ Will update with thoughts! =D

[EDIT]

Bah. The multi angle of elegy is just one additional angle, focusing ONLY on Ken throughout the whole PV in all his nakedness. Except for the fact that the camera hovers infuriatingly above all the nice bits and there is nothing you can do about it. MEH. I still kind of love it though. I mean, five and a half minutes of pure Kenken singing in agony is kind of my thing. xD





Screencaps! All clickable for your perving pleasure. (Or mine, not that it's any of your business xD)

Ken looks hot when he's in pain. Oh my, what wrong thoughts are you trying to give us Ken! Mmmmm.

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... he blogged at 1:32 PM | 4 comments! Leave a comment please!

Because I just need to post something random every now and then...
Monday, April 28, 2008

... else my head would explode all over this blog and you get to see it being all bloody and goopy.

And if you're the kind that likes that kind of stuff, then shoo. This blog is filled with cotton candy and flowers and is run by a bunch of dwarves and an unnaturally fair lady.

So first of all, while I was linking people up (people who have linked me, please let me know. I have a hard time checking through Technorati to find out who linked me xD), I saw this:



What the hell? PREGNANT WOMEN?! SINCE WHEN HAVE I BLOGGED ABOUT PREGNANT WOMEN?! (Except that ONCE in the Avex scandal entry.) Is my blog like secretly popular with pregnant women or something? If so.... should I like start posting baby photos or something? Are you pregnant ladies really ok with all the snark around here?

I'm getting very confused.

Also, I like how it calls my blog THE blog. Mind you, it's not A blog but THE blog. I feel so special.

Next up, J-pop shopping! How bad is it that I snatched this up?



Basically the whole process went like this:

*clicks on random links with pretty pictures*
*sees magazine*
*thinks to self: Bah, I'm not going to spend 2000 yen on a magazine...... HOMGAH 1000 YEN ONLY?!*
*clicks frantically to SMJ*
*Buys*

I think the seller accidentally priced it 500 yen cheaper than what he/she wanted, so ohwells. I benefit. =D

Next target:



Which has this photoshoot:



My brain just short-circuited at the second picture of Kenken lying there all vulnerable and lickable and ASKASLKHDLAKJDL.

Did I also mention that my magazine from Amazon are arriving this week along with Kenken's single and DVD? LOVE! Who cares if it's the second week of school! Who cares if my teacher's a pain in the arse? IT'S KENKEN WEEK!

So people who hate reading my purchase posts, you can steer clear of this blog for the next week.
Something really random happened in school last week.

See, my real name is Avian Jun and I like most of my schoolmates to call me Jun (like the month, except without the "E" as in like Matsumoto Jun URGH). So this happened:

New friend: Hi! I'm May!
Me: Hi I'm Jun.
May: Oh. *stares in a you-are-so-lame manner*

I found it vaguely amusing, yet felt kind of bad at the same time. WHY AM I STUCK WITH SUCH A PUN-ABLE NAME?!!! WHY.

This post shall come to a very abrupt end.

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... he blogged at 7:09 AM | 4 comments! Leave a comment please!

SUMMER TIME makes NEWS frisky
Thursday, April 24, 2008

Hey, the song is catchy and all pure-sounding, but the PV is really just innuendo all around. Someone should give these boys a prize. (WARNING: DIRTY POST AHEAD. Heh... head. *slaps self*)












And lastly...



So now we know. Tegoshi is the whore of the group. Oh wait, we knew that a long time ago didn't we?

Psst, people from the daelite's LJ post? I READ WHAT YOU SAID. TSK.

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... he blogged at 4:33 PM | 8 comments! Leave a comment please!

Raidmycast?
Tuesday, April 22, 2008


powered by ODEO

Very possibly a one-off thing, unless people really like it, which I highly doubt they (or you) will. You'll get to hear me talk about the weather, school and possibly the most embarrassing event in my life. Beware of my swearing friend.

Tracks played:
Fujimoto Miki - Boogie Train '03
AAA - That's Right
Kanjani 8 - Naniwa Iroha Bushi
Tackey & Tsubasa - X ~DAME~
The Babystars - SUNDAY

... he blogged at 1:48 AM | 5 comments! Leave a comment please!

NEWS X RUSS-K: Some random comments
Sunday, April 20, 2008


As always, I have opinions on just about everything in the world.

[Yamapi]



My dear Yamapi, people don't go surfing in long white pants, and certainly not in those sandals. Stop acting, we know you're trying.

[Shige]



Not bad, a bit plain but I guess that's just who you are Kato-kun. What's the cup he's holding though? And is Japan THAT cold? Why do you need to wear scarves in the summer?

[Koyama]



When I first saw this I thought "Hmmmmmm, this looks reeeeallly familiar".



Ah, that's it. Don't they look like they're from the same photoshoot? Who knew, UVERworld had some Russ-K in them too! I'm not liking Koyama's bright-red-signature-JE-tight-pants though. UVERworld 1, Koyama 0, the manly pants is the winner!

[Masuda]



Easily my favorite of the lot. Hey, at least the guy is bright and cheery for summer alright? The other members of NEWS look like they promoting coffins with their sulky faces. Tsk. I like the simple bright colors. They match well and look fresh too.

[Tegoshi]



Tegoshi, be a good boy and RETURN KATO HIS SCARF AND YAMAPI HIS SANDALS! Couldn't you come up with something original for yourself?

[Ryo]



Now where have I seen THIS before....



Oh yes, that's where. xD Ryo is going to be acting as Peter's (Milo Ventimiglia) long-lost asian brother. He has really strong arms as a superpower. That and irresistable charm.

At least he shows off his arms...? Otherwise it is rather boring an outfit. I think KAT-TUN wore it last year. *shrugs* Too late Ryo!

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... he blogged at 7:41 AM | 8 comments! Leave a comment please!