Raid My Minibar: Don't get laid. Get Raid.


Perhaps actors should stick to acting.
Friday, April 11, 2008

Another album review to tide me over till the next PV is out. MISIA's latest PV is already out, but that was a big yawn with her staring hornily at the telescope-thingy, so I passed on reviewing that one.

The album this time is Tamaki Hiroshi's Bridge! Most of you should know the guy from Nodame Cantabile (possibly the best J-drama ever, go watch) or from the 2189371982 CMs he's appearing in nowadays. Which goes to show how good he is in acting, and how bad he is at singing. He's released 7 singles and 1 album prior to this release for goodness's sakes.

Taking out all the songs that have been released previously, including the silly album versions, I'm left with 5 measly songs. This feels like an AAA album already..... oh wait, he's under Avex? Ah, no wonder.

I've decided to ditch my normal way for reviewing (the good, the bad and the so-so), because there's really nothing good on this album.



Don't you just love how he looks so shocked in both of them?

Now to be completely honest, Hirotama's stuff is hardly ever bad (with the exception of his lives, in which case ALL of them are bad), but they're really not GREAT either. Similarly with this album, the whole album is pretty much okay for casual listening, with the songs pleasant enough to not make you want to skip to the next song IMMEDIATELY (oh you know the kind), yet not impressive enough to have it on replay for weeks on end.

Perhaps the reason for this phenomena with his music is because they're so persistently similar. Every single song has a strong drum beat, with various guitars and perhaps a bass depending on the song. Even the tunes are similar. If you listen through the whole album without paying too much attention, you'll find yourself not being able to distinguish ANY songs apart, except maybe having thoughts like "I think there's a slow song or two in there". And even that is a stretch.

To describe his music, it would be light rock with a heavy dash of pop. Pretty much my type of music, but give them a full album of the same music and you'd find even the most hardcore fan complaining. He hardly stands out from the crowd, except perhaps for the fact that he smokes really openly. If you turn to the back of the album to see the tracklisting, he's there smoking a cigar. Flip open his previous album's lyrics booklet, he's in one of the pages smoking. Play his previous album's DVD, he smokes in a scene or two. Watch the DVD of him in Hawaii, guess what he does? Smoke yet AGAIN.

Needless to say, he's in for a short life. Or maybe he'll just outsmart death just like all the other Japanese chain smokers.

So instead of my normal review, I'll just take two songs and write about them. One song that is pretty much the basic sound of the whole album, and one song that is different from the rest in the album.

The only song that is VERY different from the others in this album is Kimi no Inai Heya de. And even so, the song still has a slow beat tapping in the background. It pretty much sounds like your ordinary ballad, complete with piano, strings and emotional singing. I'm rather impressed with his voice in this one, and with how well the how song and him fits together. He can actually do ballads! The big downside of this song is how steoreotypical it is. If I were to hum a line from the song, you'd probably be able to guess how the next line sounds. The song in general lacks drama, with no climax whatsoever, just a meek die-down.

It sounds like a very romantic song your guy partner would sing to you in a piano bar in front of a roomful of strangers, after which everyone would comment what a great singer he is. Which is to say, this is hardly the kind of stuff a professional singer should be releasing. Perhaps a JE boy might...

The typical song I've chosen for this album is Beautiful Day. Heck, even the title is typical Hirotama, with one of his previous songs being Good Day. A strong drum beat, bright tune and Hirotama's husky voice complete the package of this song that is suitable for listening when riding around in a car topless (the car, not you). It makes for fairly uninteresting listening that you would expect from an Anime-song-singing band. Come to think of it, it DOES sound like an Anime ending, where all the characters of the show run through endless green fields and chase each other senselessly until they finally end up on a cliff where they get to watch the sunset together.

Would I recommend buying this album? Probably for the booklet to ogle at Hirotama, because he's a skinny piece of mancandy. Otherwise, you'd just be better off buying a couple of songs digitally. A consistent but similarly boring effort as compared to his previous works, it's little wonder why it didn't sell well.

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