H!P X JE = Different Gender Same Agenda?
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
I've just watched the latest Buono PV and realized that they highly resemble a certain JE group, and upon closer look I realized that this can be said for many other groups as well. So here's my little observation on H!P and JE.
[Buono]JE parallel: KAT-TUNBoth these groups are undoubtedly performing the heavier songs amongst their peers, and the same can be said on their choice of attire. Both groups have gained immense popularity from the start and it seems that nothing will stop them both.
Sadly, it seems I will never grow to like these two groups' music.
[Ongaku Gatas]
JE Parallel: Kanjani 8
Both groups seem to have songs that are more fun-based than anything else, which makes them both enjoyable to listen to generally. They take a very broad range of genres, yet manage to sound cute and even hilarious when they're at it. Very easily my favorite groups of them all.
[GAM]
JE Parallel: Tackey & TsubasaWell, both groups have two very popular members from their company thrown together to make a very strong group vocally. Their songs seem to be astoundingly similar as well (
LU LU LU is very similar to TxT's
Serenade), which shows for something I guess. Both groups have one person that outshines the other a lot more (Mikitty and Tackey) and I guess it's just pure coincidence that the duo's names just happen to rhyme correspondingly (Tackey X Mikitty, Aya X Tsubasa). Most of the time I would like them and their songs, but sometimes they just release songs that make me want to punch my face in. It's freaky how similar they are. Oh, and both groups have homo-tendencies going on as well. *shrugs*
[Berryz Kobo & °C-ute]
JE Parallels: NEWS & HEY! SAY! JUMPAll groups are very popular and have a huge member count. Berryz Kobo and NEWS both debuted at 8 members, and have "lost" members along the way (1 for Berryz, 2 for NEWS).
All four groups were not supposed to be as they are right now. NEWS & HSJ debuted only because they were insanely popular, C-ute was only formed because of... I don't know what. Berryz Kobo was supposed to have more members (or rotating members), but stuck as what they are right now. In any case, these four groups were formed rather randomly, and have since gained immense popularity.
Also, both C-ute and NEWS's first singles were not sold by conventional methods (record stores) but rather by some way that only Japanese fans can buy (7-11 for NEWS, concert venues and official store for C-ute).
C-ute and HSJ both sing very cutesy songs, much due to their age. Berryz Kobo and NEWS take on a myriad of different genres, yet all of it work for them somehow.
[Morning Musume]
JE Parallel: SMAPBoth groups are undoubtedly old and have both established a good name for themselves. Most people associate H!P with Momusu and JE with SMAP. Both groups are responsible for the idol-culture in Japan that we see right now, and are also responsible for the rise of their respective companies. Both groups happen to be insanely well known for two songs respectively (
Lion heart/Sekai ni Hitotsu Dake no Hana for SMAP, and
Renai Revolution 21/Love Machine for Momusu). Both groups have one song with PEACE in its title (
The Peace! for Momusu,
PEACE! for SMAP) and have one "Dear" song (Roman My DEAR boy for Momusu, Dear Woman for SMAP). Both groups have crazy amounts of loyal fans (especially older ones) but are seeing a slight decline in younger fans. Both groups' record sales are also on the decline. Both groups' latest singles happen to bring in the lowest sales they've had in years.
So you see, JE and H!P is not all that different after all. Other similarities include having official shops, selling official photos and having a crazy amount of overseas fans all wanting to hike to Japan just to attend a concert or go to one of those shops.
Which is why I stick to Hirai Ken. Name me another old, probably-gay, sings well, does the Soul/Jazz/Ballads/R&B genres best, tall, Caucasian-looking guy in Japan. (I happen to know of one, but I'm just keeping quiet xD) You probably won't find any, but if you do, you and I make very good friends. =D
Oh and I've just won these a few days ago on YJA!
Happy fan. =D
Labels: Berryz Kobo, Buono, C-ute, GAM, Hey Say JUMP, Hirai Ken, Kanjani 8, KAT-TUN, Morning Musume, NEWS, Ongaku Gatas, SMAP, Tackey and Tsubasa
2008? // SMAP?
Friday, January 11, 2008
I
predict I will be crazy about these 3 artistes in 2008. We'll see how things go.
Who knows, I could be totally wrong, we'll find out at the end of 2008. =D
And to answer more doubts about my formula for a star (huahuahua), here's a little recap.
A popular Jpop group would need to be purely female or male to be successful. In addition, having as many of these qualities as possible would result in higher popularity.
- Young (Below 30s)
- Sings / Writes songs very well
- Is controversial in some way / Sells sex
- Gives off homo-tendencies
And the group in question today is...
[SMAP]Points fulfilled: Apparently none?
Best sales in 2007: 157,663 copies for Dangan Fighter
Why would a group with zero points fulfilled still sell this well?
Let's go back in time when they still could sing, and still were young. Judging by their oldest member Nakai, it means we have to go back till before 2002.
Points fulfilled: 1, 2, 3, 4
Best sales in 2000: 1,563,260 copies for Lion Heart
Back when they were still young, Kimutaku and Tsuyoshi Kusanagi were both at the height of their careers (what with Kimitaku in numerous dramas and Tsuyoshi in that eating-non-stop show). Hence it is safe for us to say that their single sold very much on sex appeal too, even if no actual body-baring was involved.
Back when they were still young, homo-tendencies between members (Goro Inagaki was the object of ALL their affection) was still acceptable. Now that they are "old", it's just plain weird.
Back then, they could still sing.
Seeing as such, they were a four-point group which sold ridiculously well. That 150-odd thousand doesn't seem so impressive now does it.
Few years later, Nakai was 31 and they managed to sell 2-million odd copies of
Sekai ni Hitotsu Dake no Hana. They've never seen such success ever since.
However, it is still odd that a group like this can still sell over 100k copies in today's music industry. I attribute much of this to reputation, and fan loyalty.
A SMAP fan that liked them from the start would easily be in their 30s or 40s now. Surely being young and sex appeal and all that doesn't really matter to these fans because they've liked SMAP for such a long time and familiarity just triumphs.
That said, this would have been a 5th factor, except that it contradicts point number 1. Young people haven't had enough time to build themselves a reputation the SMAP way.
But surely, reputation for other young artists will grow, and SMAP's reputation will fall just like it already did. Soon other artists' reputation will outshine SMAP (overused example: Koda Kumi) and SMAP will lose out on the music industry cake.
In any case, as time goes on, SMAP will slowly lose its fan base. Out of every 10 SMAP fans back then, only 1 still likes them now. If the fan base continues decaying like this, in 6 years we'll be looking at 10k sales.
SMAP is a typical product. A product enters the market as a Star, with loads of
growth potential. The product
matures and becomes a cash cow, which is SMAP during their
Lion Heart years. Right now however, they've entered the marketing stage known as decay, or
death of a product.
Good luck to them.
Labels: Hirai Ken, Koda Kumi, Nishikido Ryo, SMAP
Nakai Masahiro denies rumors
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Just in case you've been a bit slow, Nakai Masahiro was rumored to have been dating Koda Kumi just a while back. Something about Kuu buying vegetables and going to his house to stay for a pretty long while.
This naturally sparked off tons of debate about Avex's Queens matching Johnny's Kings and giving birth to incredibly powerfully-voiced babies (though obviously not possible in this case, what with Nakai's horrible voice). Fans were speculating and I was cringing at Kuu's lack of taste in men.
However, right after the 58th Kouhaku Utagassen, Nakai denies the rumors that he and Kuu are dating and cohabiting (or so I assume, "全然、何もないんです。お泊まり愛？ 全然ないんです").
This is rather fascinating to me. Fans of either half of this romance would have known that this was a rumor that has been around since August 2007. Why would he deny it only after Kuu has been spotted going to his house with groceries?
Let's assume just for the sake of, that Nakai is telling the truth. Who was that grocery-girl that has been mistaken for Koda Kumi? Why has SHE kept so quiet for such a long time?
If I were a typical girl who had been mistaken for Koda Kumi, I would be pretty darn happy, and start telling all my friends about how dumb the media and everyone in Japan is for not knowing its me in the photo.
One of my very evil friends will then call the media, telling them my real identity, and I will then be constantly hounded by the paparazzi. After a few months, I will release a statement that we have broken up and then go on to release 3 multi-million-selling singles.
OR! I would be so touched that my dear Nakai-chan has protected my identity and denied the horrible rumor about him and Koda Kumi. I will then go on to tell all my friend about what a wonderful boyfriend he is.
THEN one of my very evil friends will then call the media, telling them my real identity, and I will then be constantly hounded by the paparazzi. After a few months, I will release a statement that we have started planning our marriage and then go on to release 5 multi-million-selling singles.
Either way, that girl buying groceries may not know it now, but she is going to be darn popular in a few months time.
But IF the grocery girl IS Koda Kumi, oh ho ho. Won't Nakai be in for some deep shit.
Koda Kumi will quarrel with him, and eventually break up with him. She will go on to write endless sad songs about her breakup, lose a lot of weight and wear heavy gothic eye make-up. In other words, she will begin her de-evolution into Mika Nakashima.
During the big fight that eventually led to their breakup, Koda Kumi jumped on Nakai, breaking multiple bones in his body. He will not be able to reconstruct any of them due to him being old and... old. He will go on to tell his life story to a close friend of his, who happens to be very evil and money-minded (*ahem* Kimutaku *Ahem*) and that close friend will go on to produce a movie about Nakai's life. The movie will be aptly titled
The life of a Johnny's Uncle. A lot of fangirls will watch the movie, pity him and he will still rank in anan's yearly male ranking.
Kimu... I mean his friend will earn a lot of money and live happily ever after. Until Johnny Kitagawa decides to sue him for using
Johnny's in his movie title. The issue will get so big that Johnny Depp will be forced to change his name as well.
Now who says Jpop is boring? xD
Labels: Koda Kumi, SMAP
My Top 10 of EVERYTHING for 2007 (part 3)
Friday, December 14, 2007
Initially I want to continue on the HM@ X Guro post, but I had nothing much to say except how cute Aika is, so I skipped that.
Then I was going to compile a list of my top 10 artists of 2007, but as Kimitsu noted, it is very overused. So I'll have to keep that till I'm really desperate.
And so, here's the topic this time:
TOP 10 FASHION DISASTERS ON MUSIC STATION
I doubt anyone has done this yet (if they have, they're really bored and insane, like I am). So here we go!
Number 10: BoAThis outfit looks plenty weird on our dear BoA. Doesn't it look like a modified raincoat to you? No wait, actually it doesn't. It looks like the sewing machine ate up her curtain AND her raincoat, then vomited out this mess. And is that a plastic bag she's wearing as a skirt? Oh goodness.
Number 9: Masuda (NEWS)Looks like someone woke up way too late and rushed to work immediately. Since when is it okay to go on a television show in your pajamas? Worse still, it looks like the pajamas of a CLOWN. Add on to that grandma's cardigan, and you have this lovely outfit. Smashing.
Number 8: Arashi
Damn! Masuda already wore his grandmother's outfit! What should we wear! Oh I know! Why don't we cut up this lovely purple carpet and make them into cool outfits that match! Oh the fangirls are going to think we're so cool with our matching outfits, and it's so unique too! Damn, we're smart!
Number 7: Nakai Masahiro (SMAP)
While this really isn't a bad outfit, Nakai is simply OLD, and old people should refrain from wearing jeans with huge holes that are way too close to their.....
Ahem, anyways. Someone tell me why he is wearing bandages on his hands? Is it some old-people kind of fashion statement that I can't seem to understand? Looks that way for sure.
Number 6: Kanjani 8Kanjani 8 has an odd fetish for wearing utterly HORRIBLE outfits, and this set won't let you down either. Gaudy colors that simply clash like a paint truck accident, this would have been painful to look at, had it not been so funny. Which is what Kanjani 8 does really, be funny in horrible outfits.
Number 5: Yuna Ito
Identity crisis alert! Yuna can't decide whether she wants to be a nun, some choir girl or to go to a funeral! Won't someone help the poor girl out? Start with that hideous huge bow tie please. *shivers*
Number 4: Hamasaki Ayumi
I really don't know what's wrong with the outfit, but it just is. Perhaps because of her messed up hair, her tired face, and how revealing this outfit is, it gives me the impression that Ayumi was doing something really vigorous (if you know what I mean) just 10 minutes before the show. Couldn't she keep her recreational activites for after the show? Desperate much?
Number 3: Akira (EXILE)*headtable* Why did he choose such an OLD LOOKING SUIT TO WEAR?! He doesn't look all too young to begin with, so he should really choose something that makes him look.... fresher at least. Now he simply looks like a grandfather, with bad fashion sense. Which is not too far a stretch is it?
Number 2: Koda KumiAnother artist infamous for godawful outfits, Koda Kumi outdoes herself this time in this pink-blue-black-purple outfit (the colour scheme of an injury, then a bruise). She couldn't decide between the gray and the pink top and hence decides to safety-pin the two together. Then she faces another dilemma - leggings or shorts? Then comes the sudden realization that SHE CAN WEAR BOTH! So both it is. Looking at herself in the mirror, she can't really decide what style of clothing she is wearing. Since it is more sporty than anything, she decides to steal the shoes of a random Tohoshinki member to complete this nightmarish getup. Kudos for moxie.
Number 1: Akanishi Jin
Hmmm, why does this outfit look so familiar?
Oh yes that's why.
Akanishi Jin, having no idea what to wear decides to consult fashionista Koda Kumi! Koda Kumi simply lends him this outfit (that she wore on Music Station too) and tells him not to worry. Jin sure knows where to look for help doesn't he!
My biggest gripe with this outfit is probably how furry it is. Akanishi Jin should not be on Music station, but rather on Sesame street or something. In fact, he looks like he went to Sesame Street JAIL. He should really go there though, considering what a huge fashion crime he is committing here.
[A few of the better dressed ones]
Hirai Ken, KinKi Kids and Miyake (mihimaru GT)Labels: Arashi, BoA, EXILE, Hamasaki Ayumi, Hirai Ken, Ito Yuna, Kanjani 8, KAT-TUN, KinKi Kids, Koda Kumi, mihimaru GT, NEWS, SMAP
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